Porn is attractive. If I were to be perfectly open and honest with you. Satan is no fool, he's not going to make something so incredibly destructive that isn't really, really good looking. There are a couple things I am going to go into on this subject, and I hope you take something from it.
Porn isn't limited to just looking up undressed women online, it's more. Porn can be the images of nearly undressed women on a magazine, a scene in a movie or TV show, a sexually explicit song, or joke. Anything and everything that causes a man's thoughts to become wrapped up with sex. What ever causes a man to fantasize that idea, is porn. It's destructive. It's deadly. And it's attractive. Porn is most accurately described as anything that causes a man to lust. And Christ said that lusting after a girl is the same as having sex with her, so in reality, lust is rape. Yeah, it's extremely sick. That being said, I struggle with porn. I struggle walking in a store, to keep my eyes off of a magazine. To stay away from media that preaches these things to me. I struggle, like crazy. And it kills me. I hate it.
Porn, lust, is deadly. The Proverbs talks about adultery leading to death, all the time. From both, my experience, and study of this, I have noticed several affects of these two.
Anger. It makes a man so hateful, so angry. They will lash out due to the smallest thing. In rage, without mercy, and it's crazy. In this relationships are destroyed. Trust is lost. People are hurt, afraid, and want nothing to do with the person.
It degrades a man's view of women. They no longer are a treasure, they are an object, a possession to be used for pleasure. They are tools for a man's lust. The sacredness that men should view women in is destroyed. For someone addicted (not necessarily a simple struggle, but a straight up addiction) all they think about is sex when they see a girl. Sex controls their thoughts. Thoughts become words, and thus comes sexual jokes.
Porn/Lust goes so much deeper than all this, in ways that I praise God I don't know, and that I pray I never do. It kills in a marriage.
I say all of this for a couple reasons.
1: I am tired of being a goody-two-shoes. I mean, no, I'm not going to just sin all I want. What I mean is, I am tired of looking so good on the outside when I struggle. I want to be open, I want to be transparent. Why? Honesty heals. I want people to see my struggles and realize that I do not at all, have everything under control. I want to teach them what I am learning as I fight through these struggles. I want them to realize that I will not judge them for their faults, because I have my own.
2: I want to show guys, young or old, why they need to destroy this sin that they struggle with. I want them to realize how dangerous it is. Because with each glance, every fantasy, they are discriminating women, and destroying the value that they will hold for their wife. She will become just another object of lust, and not a treasure. Trust will break, and the marriage will fail. The husband will most likely become very angry and abusive. Why? The girl was nothing but a tool for the guy's lust. Lust, porn, it's so deadly.
3: I want to in a way, show why I don't do stuff that other people do. The reason why I don't listen to certain music, and watch certain things. It's not because I am some great Christian, it's actually the exact opposite. It is because I am weak that I refuse to watch and listen to these things. Because they make me fall in my Lust. I don't do these things in order to protect my mind. It's a defense. Because I don't want to pursue a girl and have all of my thoughts focusing on her body rather than her heart. I want to treasure her, not use her. I want to desire only my wife, and not other women. I don't want my desire of my wife to be just a simple replacement of a desire of other women. I want to keep my mind, and motives pure, before and during marriage. And habits don't just die when you get married. What you struggle with before marriage, will catch you after. So I am fighting to kill these things now.
4: I want to try and help other guys defeat this sin, by showing how I have had success in this. No, I'm not perfect, and in my own strength, I am helpless. But I have Christ, and He helps me here.
You have to be intentional when fighting sin. You can't just think you're gonna pray and stop. You gotta fight. This is a fierce battle that we fight. Don't think you will win this battle without fighting. That being said, guard yourself. If there is anything that you participate with that causes you to fall, lust, and dwell on thoughts of sex, then get rid of it. If it tempts you to look up inappropriate images, then kill it, get rid of it.
Pray, but don't just pray. Spend some real time with God. In this battle, the Bible is our Sword, and the Spirit is our Champion Who is ready and willing to fight in our stead. Master your weapon. Like a trained soldier knows his weapon, so we should know how to use our sword. And know when to give it to God.
Rebuke Satan. Literally command him in the name, and by the Power of Jesus Christ--Who has set us free--to flee from you.
I hope this helps those who are struggling. Remember. God is forgiving, but don't take advantage of His Grace. Accept it. But don't abuse it.
Thanks for reading,
John Mark,
Porn isn't limited to just looking up undressed women online, it's more. Porn can be the images of nearly undressed women on a magazine, a scene in a movie or TV show, a sexually explicit song, or joke. Anything and everything that causes a man's thoughts to become wrapped up with sex. What ever causes a man to fantasize that idea, is porn. It's destructive. It's deadly. And it's attractive. Porn is most accurately described as anything that causes a man to lust. And Christ said that lusting after a girl is the same as having sex with her, so in reality, lust is rape. Yeah, it's extremely sick. That being said, I struggle with porn. I struggle walking in a store, to keep my eyes off of a magazine. To stay away from media that preaches these things to me. I struggle, like crazy. And it kills me. I hate it.
Porn, lust, is deadly. The Proverbs talks about adultery leading to death, all the time. From both, my experience, and study of this, I have noticed several affects of these two.
Anger. It makes a man so hateful, so angry. They will lash out due to the smallest thing. In rage, without mercy, and it's crazy. In this relationships are destroyed. Trust is lost. People are hurt, afraid, and want nothing to do with the person.
It degrades a man's view of women. They no longer are a treasure, they are an object, a possession to be used for pleasure. They are tools for a man's lust. The sacredness that men should view women in is destroyed. For someone addicted (not necessarily a simple struggle, but a straight up addiction) all they think about is sex when they see a girl. Sex controls their thoughts. Thoughts become words, and thus comes sexual jokes.
Porn/Lust goes so much deeper than all this, in ways that I praise God I don't know, and that I pray I never do. It kills in a marriage.
I say all of this for a couple reasons.
1: I am tired of being a goody-two-shoes. I mean, no, I'm not going to just sin all I want. What I mean is, I am tired of looking so good on the outside when I struggle. I want to be open, I want to be transparent. Why? Honesty heals. I want people to see my struggles and realize that I do not at all, have everything under control. I want to teach them what I am learning as I fight through these struggles. I want them to realize that I will not judge them for their faults, because I have my own.
2: I want to show guys, young or old, why they need to destroy this sin that they struggle with. I want them to realize how dangerous it is. Because with each glance, every fantasy, they are discriminating women, and destroying the value that they will hold for their wife. She will become just another object of lust, and not a treasure. Trust will break, and the marriage will fail. The husband will most likely become very angry and abusive. Why? The girl was nothing but a tool for the guy's lust. Lust, porn, it's so deadly.
3: I want to in a way, show why I don't do stuff that other people do. The reason why I don't listen to certain music, and watch certain things. It's not because I am some great Christian, it's actually the exact opposite. It is because I am weak that I refuse to watch and listen to these things. Because they make me fall in my Lust. I don't do these things in order to protect my mind. It's a defense. Because I don't want to pursue a girl and have all of my thoughts focusing on her body rather than her heart. I want to treasure her, not use her. I want to desire only my wife, and not other women. I don't want my desire of my wife to be just a simple replacement of a desire of other women. I want to keep my mind, and motives pure, before and during marriage. And habits don't just die when you get married. What you struggle with before marriage, will catch you after. So I am fighting to kill these things now.
4: I want to try and help other guys defeat this sin, by showing how I have had success in this. No, I'm not perfect, and in my own strength, I am helpless. But I have Christ, and He helps me here.
You have to be intentional when fighting sin. You can't just think you're gonna pray and stop. You gotta fight. This is a fierce battle that we fight. Don't think you will win this battle without fighting. That being said, guard yourself. If there is anything that you participate with that causes you to fall, lust, and dwell on thoughts of sex, then get rid of it. If it tempts you to look up inappropriate images, then kill it, get rid of it.
Pray, but don't just pray. Spend some real time with God. In this battle, the Bible is our Sword, and the Spirit is our Champion Who is ready and willing to fight in our stead. Master your weapon. Like a trained soldier knows his weapon, so we should know how to use our sword. And know when to give it to God.
Rebuke Satan. Literally command him in the name, and by the Power of Jesus Christ--Who has set us free--to flee from you.
I hope this helps those who are struggling. Remember. God is forgiving, but don't take advantage of His Grace. Accept it. But don't abuse it.
Thanks for reading,
John Mark,
John, I just have to say I appreciate your honesty with this post. I bet it wasn't easy, but you did a very good job with words.
ReplyDeleteAs a girl who grew up basically without my Dad being there, I never really realized of much of a struggle lust is for guys. No one, and I mean no one talked about it with me. But I was smart enough to key in on radio stations when they'd talk about it and the importance of fighting this sin.
I do have a couple books on modesty for the young lady that I have yet to really crack open in my spare time, which I seem to not have very much of anymore.
But anyways, thank you for being honest in your post. I appreciate it. :)
Of course! I actually am beginning more and more to enjoy being so blunt with people about my struggles. I've noticed that people in life who have impacted me the most did just that. I am hoping that my honesty will reach some and heal some.
ReplyDeleteYou said that growin up no one taught you this. Are there any other subjects that you were never taught? I would love to research them and to try and show the truth about these things biblically.
Thanks for your feedback by the way!